10 Things Models Hate Hearing

Modelling is perhaps the most complex business around. There are many upsides, but the downright insane requirements are plentiful. Making it harder is most of the general population doesn't understand how any of it works. Combine public misinformation with an extremely high stakes industry and you get a clusterf*ck of ridiculous questions and statements being sent a model's way. Here are a few...

FROM NON-MODEL PEOPLE

10. "I thought models aren't supposed to eat that?"

I'm taking a break. It's my cheat day. I'm on my period. I don't need to have MY GODDAMN CROISSANT ANALYZED, CAROL.

9. "Modelling doesn't require talent"

You try running around a huge city to multiple castings a day with the hangover to end all hangovers. Or, maybe try dealing with the aftermath of a test shoot where they painted your whole face red and backcombed your hair halfway to hell. Okay, perhaps this is true but I still hate hearing it. If you've dedicated your life to something, having it discredited calls for a little hissy fit.

8. "You must get so much free clothing"

The amount of times I've very obviously hinted that I loved a particular clothing item on a shoot rivals the amount of under 18 models Karl Lagerfeld uses in his shows. But damn if I've ever gotten to keep anything. Back to the H & M sales rack I go.

7. "You don't need to lose weight!"

When your entire career weighs on half an inch, you'll be sure this ain't the time to "accept yourself as you are." The standards for this industry are insane and one must fit into the sample clothes, or find another job.

FROM INDUSTRY PEOPLE

6. "We're just going to give you a trim"

Anytime a client has said that, EVER, it means we're going to bleach your hair twice, dye it pink, and cut 10 cm off. If you hear this phrase, run!

5. "You don't mind shooting nude, do you?"

Um, yeah I do mind. I am a person, not some mannequin you can strip to nothing whenever you feel like it. And I also forgot to shave.

4. "Hey, I want to do a shoot with you (and my entire website is either porn or cosplay)"

A TFP (Testing for Print) is a shoot that all parties benefits from. Key word being benefit. So no, Sugar Buns Cosplay Photography, I will NOT be benefiting from an abysmal shoot with your Kodak point and shoot camera. Unless you pay me, then I'll be your Pikachu every day of the week.

3. "You are confirmed!" (But jk, the show went on without you)

My favourite part of castings are when you are "99% confirmed" for a big time job. Three years later and you still stalk the brand's instagram still waiting for the call time.

2. "Can you lose 3 inches off your hips in a week?"

Why, I would love to, you know, if that was humanly possible.

And FInally...

1. "We're never going to pay you!!"

Now I haven't outright heard this, but you can bet your ass that when it's been 9 months since a job and I've not seen jack sh*t that I can imagine my former agency thinking this.

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Are you a model who's heard some stupid stuff? Let me know!

And coming up next week, 10 things I love about modelling. (Can't always be Debbie Downer!)

-With Love, Lex